Myjellybean.com

Dear Hurt and Betrayed,

It's awful to feel like your friends are ganging up on you. This is a tricky situation, because if you start acting whiney, or accuse them of talking behind your back (which obviously they are), they'll probably just get annoyed and use it as an excuse to gossip even more.

I don't know if these friendships can be saved, or if it's time for you to find another group of friends. If you want to try, though, here's my suggestion. Choose the friend who you feel closest with, the one who hasn't been yakking about you with the others, and pull her aside for a private chat. Be sure none of the other girls are around to overhear.

Tell this friend that this situation with your group is stressing you out, and ask her to tell you honestly if you did anything to make the others stop liking you as much. Keep an open mind, because once you ask that question, it's possible you might find out that yes, there was something you did, that started all of this. (I'm not saying you're at fault, or that there's any excuse for your friends' bad behavior, but you need to know if in their eyes, you were the cause of how all this begun).

Try to listen at least as much as you talk, when you discuss the situation with your friend. Take on board what she tells you, and if there's a way you could change to make the others act nicer, consider doing it. You can also make it clear to your friend that you're confused by all this, and you just want everyone to get along, and ask her if she has any suggestions for making it all blow over.

It's possible that this is just a phase your group is going through - it happens - and that when some other drama comes up, everyone will focus on that and stop bugging you. In the meantime, do your best to act friendly to your friends, don't make accusations, and don't start gossiping about them in retaliation. Take the high road, refuse to be bullied into becoming a less-good person, and see what happens. Good luck to you.