BOYFRIEND VS. GRADES
Having a boyfriend is a lot of fun. But when it starts messing with your ability to focus on school or do anything else besides seeing your boyfriend, a relationship becomes a negative thing. Myjellybean.com presents tips for balancing your love relationship with the rest of your life.
Don't Neglect Grades for a Babe
Sure, snuggling on the couch with your boyfriend is a lot more fun than doing homework and studying. But if you neglect your schoolwork, you will end up regretting it later. Boyfriends come and go, but your school records are permanent!
It's very common for girls to get wrapped up in their boyfriends, and pay less attention to taking their education seriously. But if you let your grades start slipping just because you are distracted by a relationship, you might not be able to get those marks back up in the future. It is much easier to maintain good grades, than to start from the bottom.
You might think it's an exaggeration, but this could really affect your future. Your grade levels will definitely affect what kind of college you can get into. That will affect what kind of job you get and ultimately, what you end up doing with your whole life. You don't want to be a grown-up with a bad job, just because you didn't pay attention during high school!
So the reality is, you need to be aware when something is messing up your studies. It is perfectly possible to have a boyfriend and still achieve great things in school. You just have to make your schoolwork a priority, and learn to work other things - including your boyfriend - around that.
Love Doesn't Have To Mean 24/7
Some girls think that if they love somebody, they should spend all of their available time with that person. Yes, it's nice to hang with the dude you adore! But a little bit of space can actually increase the strength of your relationship with him.
While most girls are all about "togetherness", it's a fact that most guys like to have some "space" in a relationship. They are happier when they can spend some time with friends, or just alone. For a guy, having time apart from you actually makes the time they spend with you more special, because it's not something they can take for granted all the time. So telling your boyfriend you need a couple of nights a week to yourself, to concentrate on schoolwork, will not only benefit your studies... it is actually good for your relationship.
When You Can't Think of Anything Else
Sometimes the problem isn't too much togetherness, it's literally in a girl's own mind. Some girls get so obsessed with daydreaming about their boyfriends, that they can't think of anything else. They lose the ability to focus in class, and they can't get through five minutes of homework without drifing off in fantasies about their one-day wedding.
It's fine to get dreamy, in fact it's part of the fun of being a couple. But if you are so obsessed that your dreams interfere with the reality of doing well in school, it's time to take control of your thoughts. Love means trust and contentment and feeling secure. That means that you should be able to be apart from your boyfriend sometimes, and focus on other things, like school or friends or family. If your relationship is "good", you should really be able to go a whole hour without thinking about him. That's when you squeeze in your homework... and then you can always email or phone him when you're done!
If you obsess about your guy all the time, it could be because you are secretly worried about his feelings for you, or wishing he could change and be just a bit better as a boyfriend. Try to pinpoint exactly what your insecurities or dislikes are about the relationship, and write them down on a piece of paper. Then talk to him about your concerns. If it's a relationship worth keeping, then you should be able to discuss your feelings honestly with your boyfriend. This takes maturity, but one needs to have mature judgement to make a relationship work anyway. Once you feel more secure about how your boyfriend feels and about how the relationship is going, you'll probably be calmer and won't obsess anymore.