My Jelly Bean

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    My family is trying to bully me off my diet

    I'm 5'1" and in May last year I started going on a diet because I was overweight (I was 177 pounds) and I wanted to really loose weight. So I signed up for weight watchers and I've been watching what I eat. Since starting the diet, I've lost 30 pounds which is really good and I'm about to reach my second goal I set myself. I'm still planning on loosing more weight since I'd like to lose at least 15 more pounds. Weight Watchers (in case you don't know) is all about the points system and foods have different points. There is a set limit of points you have per day and a set of points you have per week. You can eat what you'd like as long as you stay within your points.

    My friends and bf are really supportive of my diet, but my family thinks that I'm already skinny despite my doctor telling in April last year that I was overweight and needed to lose weight. They all think that I'm abstaining from all the fattening foods and that I should live a little. My mom especially tells me that I'm skinny enough and tries to force me to eat things that completely use up all my points. When I eat a little bit (so I don't blow all my points), she then gets mad that I don't finish everything. Now I'm going to be honest and say that my family does eat a lot of fast food and high fat foods. They are also big fans of the clean the plate fan club and big portions. They don't like it when people don't finish all their food on their plate. They also don't believe much in working out so naturally most of my family is overweight. When I eat half, my family gets upsets and comments about it. Its really gets me upset since it is almost as if they are trying to make me feel guilty about wanting to take care of myself and work out. I'm not obsessive of what I eat or spend most of my time working out. Plus from time to time I will splurge a bit. But I've worked really hard to to lose weight and I've really proud at what I've accomplished so far.

    I've tried telling them respectfully that I'm watching what I eat, but they still get upset when I eat half of some of the foods they are getting. Are there any other ways to tell them politely and firmly that they need to be more respectful of how I eat?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    If I were you, I'd get a note from my doctor that said that I needed to lose weight.
    Many have I loved, and many times been bitten,
    Many times I've gazed along the open road.

    Many times I've lied and many times I've listened,
    Many times I've wondered how much there is to know.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    You definitely should be proud of what you've accomplished, especially with such negativity coming from your family! They way they are treating you is just awful. I've never heard of people being thinking that overweight is normal/preferred and not believing in working out (how does that even work? they think any exercise is bad for you?) - at worst I'd hope that people know they should be healthier, but don't follow through. I'm sorry to diss your family, but that is incredibly ignorant and extremely destructive thinking, especially when they refuse to help you help yourself.

    It's nice of you to want to be polite and firm with your family. What have you tried telling/asking them so far? And about the not cleaning your plate issue, can you insist on portioning your own food? Do you think they're hassling you because they actually think you're being unhealthy, or because you're not doing what they are? It sounds like they are obstinate and have very ingrained beliefs/lifestyle, making it difficult for them to listen to you. SmokingGun's idea of getting a doctor's note is good, so there's a professional opinion backing you up. BIC's idea sounds good, too, if they let you get away with being vegetarian.

    If the situation doesn't improve, I would try to move out. (How old are you?) I'm sure that you love your family, but your health and happiness come first, and staying with them sounds toxic to both.
    monicaacinom: I'm distraught that you aren't a nihilistic Hi-C drinker.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    It sounds like maybe they are jealous that you are losing weight and looking better while they are doing nothing about their health. Maybe you could try convincing them to do weight watchers with you?
    But you got a heart so big, it could crush this town. And I can't hold out forever, even walls fall down.

    "You're not gunna get in my head"
    "I'm already in your head"

  5. #5
    epi93 Guest
    Congratulations, 30 pounds is no joke! Right now I`m going through the same thing, although not to the same extent. My family used to be pretty supportive of my weight loss, but now (even though I eat just as much as before and exercise the same) they think I`m too thin (although I am definitely not) and try to force me to eat junk food to prove to them I`m not "starving myself." What's helped me get through to them is really just sitting down and telling them that how I eat and exercise isn't even about the number on the scale anymore, but how good I feel after a workout or when I wake up in the morning and don't feel nauseous from overeating the night before. Once they understand what your weight loss means to you and as long as you're not going to extremes to get there, I'm sure your family will be more understanding.


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