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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    112

    Going on vacation with your bf

    How long do you think you and your bf need to be dating before going on vacations together? Have you gone on a family vacation with your bf?

    My bf and I have dated for almost 3 years. Right now, our families are talking about going on vacations in the future. My family is currently trying to figure out a time to go to England in the future. My mom is currently planning that trip and she's just planning on immediate family (no significant others allowed) going on the trip. From what I've learned from her recently, this vacation will probably happen in one or two years since she is waiting on my brother to finish with graduate school before my family goes. Meanwhile, my bf's family is planning a trip to Disney World sometime during this upcoming winter or the next year. His mom is planning their trip and she's mentioned to my bf in advance that I am being included for that trip. Although these two different trips are still in the works and when happen will occur at different times (my bf's mom is planning a time during the winter while my mom is planning on the summer) depending on how the plans end up, I am wondering if 3 years is right now an appropriate time to start including each other in family vacations. I am just curious if 3 years enough time for my bf and I to start thinking about going on family vacations together.

    Note: As of right now, since plans are unofficial, I am going to let everyone figure out when these vacations will happen and just wait on my bf or his mom to formally invite me for their family vacation. This way I don't automatically assume I am included on their family vacation.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    1,569
    I don't think there's a certain amount of time you should be dating...I think it just depends on what kind of relationship you have with the family. I've been dating my boyfriend for 10 months and my parents love him so I imagine they would invite him along if we were going on a vacation.
    ~Lacey~

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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    18,556
    3 years is well enough time imo. I tend to think a year or so dating to go away for more than a weekend. One of my boyfriends cousins was dating a girl for like 6 months, and he paid for both of them to goto cancun, paid for all the activities and crap there, and then she dumped him when they got back haha. That could obv happen at any time though.
    The sooner you let 2 hearts beat together, The sooner you'll know this love is forever, Love needs time now or never

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    7,387
    I don't really know about a timeframe, it depends how old you are too IMO. I think as long as you've been together a couple months and know each other well enough to be able to handle a week straight together, then go for it. 3 years is definitely enough.

    We've gone on vacations together but not family vacations, just us two (neither of us go on family vacations anymore). The first time we went away we road tripped to Florida, we'd been together 2 years.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,103
    I think it's different with each couple, as long as both of you are comfortable with it as well as the family you're going on the trip with, then it's all good.

    I went with my boyfriend to his brother's wedding in British Columbia when we were dating just under a year. His entire family was totally cool with it, so it worked for us, and it brought us a lot closer together. It helped me get to know his family really well too.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    1,747
    We went on our first 2 vacations a few months shy of 3 years. Last May we went to Disney with his family. They invited me along and I shared a bed with his little sister and he shared a bed with his little brother haha. It was kind of weird, but that's mainly because his dad and step mom freak me out... Later that summer we went to the beach for a weekend while he was at Army training. So it was a visit/vacay. It didn't feel too soon for either, however the latter was a lot more fun

    I hope you get the formal invite - it sounds fun!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    668
    In three weeks we will be going to Cuba together and we have been dating just over a year..with my ex, he was invited to family vacations but with this one, my family hasnt gone anywhere yet...they would invite him though
    08.24.11

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  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    3,337
    Easy...if your/his parents invite you I'd say its ok to go.
    the early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    3,227
    I don't think there's really a set amount of time. Like others said, it depends on your ages and your relationship (with each other and the parents). I'm not sure where you live, but if you're from the states...I'm sure it's a lot more expensive to purchase airfare and such to london than going to disney. I would say it'd be fair for your bf to pay for half the airfare or something. Like holly said, he's not a husband (or fiance for that matter), so expecting your parents to pay everything for him is a bit insane. I went on vacations with one of my boyfriends and it was just small stuff like up north to a cabin and to cedar point (which is maybe a 5 hour drive). His parents included me in everything though...like dinners out to eat and such. I started to feel bad because they spent so much money on me and my parents didn't. Not that it was intentional, his parents just went out a lot and mine didn't. I think we were together at least 2 years before vacationing, but I was also 16-17. I'm 22 now and I think a year is definitely long enough, but I would say at least offering to pay part of your pay would be fair.
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  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    8,734
    I find it strange that you've waited so long to go away together, I went away with my boyfriend and his parents twice during the first year we were together, the first time we went 3 months after being together and the 2nd 5 months into the relationship. If parents are cool with the other going away with them, then go for it so long as you feel you can put up with being with him for that long lol
    Bazinga!

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    6,400
    Quote Originally Posted by MonitorShoeboxOfLies View Post
    I'd feel strange taking him on a family vacation, because it's... a boyfriend, not a husband? I don't know. Maybe I'm total weirdo, though. I also don't go on family vacations now that I'm an adult, so that concept alone is strange to me. Lol. I think it depends on your age. Three years is long enough time to not question that sort of thing, but three years he should have been around your family quite a bit, you know? We went on vacation together in May for a week and we have just now hit the one year mark of seeing each other, but we're adults and it was just him and I. Hah.
    Family vacations are way more fun when you're an adult. Last summer I went to Vegas with my parents, brother and my boyfriend and it was great. Obv more fun if you go to grown-up places, not Disney World haha.
    GO DUKE BLUE DEVILS

  12. #12
    It depends on your relationship and your age, I suppose.

    I'm going on a vacation with my boyfriend and his family after Christmas and then he's possibly coming with mine in February.

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