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Thread: Poet's Corner

  1. #136
    History Of Flowers Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Paradox
    To try to revive this thread- here's a question for you: What's your LEAST favorite format/rhyme scheme/style/whatever of poetry?

    I dislike paragraph formatting (doesn't really seem like poetry that way) and aabb (almost always sounds cheesy)

    I've noticed a sudden cropping of that on here, I loathe it. Especially when there are no noticable breaks, and the ones in paragraph format that dont even rhyme. Its not a poem..its just a weird little paragraph thing.

  2. #137
    burkenstock1414 Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by SweetSweetIrony
    I've noticed a sudden cropping of that on here, I loathe it. Especially when there are no noticable breaks, and the ones in paragraph format that dont even rhyme. Its not a poem..its just a weird little paragraph thing.
    actually if it is done right it is poetry. There has been a new outburst of this espec. on the slam scene. It is called Prosetry. Lots of people dont do it right though espec. on here but when it is done correctly it is rather refreshing. And also ...jsut because it doesnt rhyme...doesnt mean it isnt poetry. : )

  3. #138
    History Of Flowers Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by burkenstock1414
    actually if it is done right it is poetry. There has been a new outburst of this espec. on the slam scene. It is called Prosetry. Lots of people dont do it right though espec. on here but when it is done correctly it is rather refreshing. And also ...jsut because it doesnt rhyme...doesnt mean it isnt poetry. : )

    I know, but barely anyone here seems capable of anything else.

  4. #139
    burkenstock1414 Guest
    actually i bet lots of people would be capable but everyone is so closed minded or simply dont know that poetry DOES NOT HAVE TO RHYME for it to be GOOD poetry. They try and model themselves from authors like Poe...which Poe is amazing but he also wrote for a certain time period...ah- well what can you do...o well.

  5. #140
    Paradox Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by burkenstock1414
    actually i bet lots of people would be capable but everyone is so closed minded or simply dont know that poetry DOES NOT HAVE TO RHYME for it to be GOOD poetry. They try and model themselves from authors like Poe...which Poe is amazing but he also wrote for a certain time period...ah- well what can you do...o well.
    Some have tried, but it doesn't improve the quality of some of the poetry on here.

  6. #141
    SempreStaccato Guest
    http://www.myjellybean.com/chat/showthread.php?t=333409

    I dont know if that worked, but I really need critique on these two and to know which ones better.

  7. #142
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    434
    oooh! rate mine or w/e

    here' some i wrote, i kno i'm not that good, but, eh, o well:

    numero uno:

    Faint sound of your voice lays awake in my head,
    I keep my feelings shut,
    While pretending youíre dead
    My timeís in a bottle,
    Along with my soul,
    Have I not tried everything to make me whole?
    Iím tryin to forget you while I sit in this hall,
    Yet you stay in my mind without a call
    Whereís the Priscilla thatís so calm, so cool,
    No loverís fool?
    I never thought it would come to this,
    But sheís gone,
    Drowned by your kiss
    So Iíll close my eyes and forget all about you, tonight......

    numero dos:

    Breathless when Iím with you
    Probably never felt that way.
    When we're together its like we're in our zone,
    A reflection of self,
    On our own.
    I try to give myself a chance to seek for sunlight without your boundaries,
    But I keep wanting you to bring me all your sweet dreams and heart melodies.
    if you ever leave me Iíll drown in tears.
    If you deceive it'll be just u all these years.
    You can remember whatís left behind,
    But you'll never find it once its gone, so hold on........
    Or carry on

    numero thres:

    Christmas is a time of lots of joys,
    A time to fill stockings with toys,

    A time of happiness, a time of cheer,
    A time to imagine St. Nick's white beard,

    A time when families gather together,
    A time to stay warm during the cold winter weather,

    A time to laugh and to sing,
    A time to hear those sleigh bells ring,
    season is fun and nice,
    But the true meaning of Christmas
    Is to Celebrate the Birth of Christ!

    The Christmas
    numero cuatro:

    I've wasted my time with you,
    Waiting for your love
    When all this time, I was by your side,
    You only looked above
    I walked the line,
    Even though you weren't kind,
    Just remember that, before Iím gone
    Before I leave, I need to say,
    That I gave you my everything,
    In every way.
    So while I cry, Iíll say good-bye,
    And never say your name.

    these are two that i'm working on:

    numero cinco:

    Looking for happiness outside from my dreams
    Canít find what Iím looking for
    Never will with these schemes
    Wishing the rain would stop, so I can walk in the sun,
    To try to make myself happy, without my loved one
    Tryna stop loving you but my heart wonít permit,
    How come my mind wonít get out of this pit??

    numero seis:
    Youíll never know about all the rainbows and butterflies in the sky.
    The dream, the chance, the hope that dies.
    Youíll never know until you realize.
    MY FAVE MUSIC ARTISTS:

    RHCP, The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Mojo Toad Quartet, John Mayer, Led Zeppelin, Sublime, Prince, Bob Marley, Marooon 5, Audioslave, Aerosmith, Guns n' Roses, The Killers, George Harrison, John Lenon, Regina Spektor, Damien Marley, Alicia Keys, Dave Matthews Band, Ellis Paul, Santana, Micheal Jackson, old Shakira, Outkast, Frederic Chopin, Rage Against the Machine, Eric Clapton, old Mariah Carey, old R. kelly, The Doors, etc.

    Sizzilingmachi is my husband! Amsal!

  8. #143
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    434
    EDIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! READ THIS ONE INSTEAD OF THE OTHER 1. FOR SOME ****TY REASON I CAN'T EDIT THE OTHER ONE.

    oooh! rate mine or w/e

    here' some i wrote, i kno i'm not that good, but, eh, o well:

    numero uno:

    Faint sound of your voice lays awake in my head,
    I keep my feelings shut,
    While pretending youíre dead
    My timeís in a bottle,
    Along with my soul,
    Have I not tried everything to make me whole?
    Iím tryin to forget you while I sit in this hall,
    Yet you stay in my mind without a call
    Whereís the Priscilla thatís so calm, so cool,
    No loverís fool?
    I never thought it would come to this,
    But sheís gone,
    Drowned by your kiss
    Looking for happiness outside from my dreams
    Canít find what Iím looking for
    Never will with these schemes
    Wishing the rain would stop, so I can walk in the sun,
    To try to make myself happy, without my loved one
    Tryna stop loving you but my heart wonít permit,
    How come my mind wonít get out of this pit??
    So Iíll close my eyes and forget all about you, tonight......

    numero dos:

    Breathless when Iím with you
    Probably never felt that way.
    When we're together its like we're in our zone,
    A reflection of self,
    On our own.
    I try to give myself a chance to seek for sunlight without your boundaries,
    But I keep wanting you to bring me all your sweet dreams and heart melodies.
    if you ever leave me Iíll drown in tears.
    If you deceive it'll be just u all these years.
    You can remember whatís left behind,
    But you'll never find it once its gone, so hold on........
    Or carry on

    numero thres:

    Christmas is a time of lots of joys,
    A time to fill stockings with toys,

    A time of happiness, a time of cheer,
    A time to imagine St. Nick's white beard,

    A time when families gather together,
    A time to stay warm during the cold winter weather,

    A time to laugh and to sing,
    A time to hear those sleigh bells ring,
    season is fun and nice,
    But the true meaning of Christmas
    Is to Celebrate the Birth of Christ!

    The Christmas

    numero cuatro:

    I've wasted my time with you,
    Waiting for your love
    When all this time, I was by your side,
    You only looked above
    I walked the line,
    Even though you weren't kind,
    Just remember that, before Iím gone
    Before I leave, I need to say,
    That I gave you my everything,
    In every way.
    So while I cry, Iíll say good-bye,
    And never say your name.

    this is one i'm working on:

    numero cinco:

    Youíll never know about all the rainbows and butterflies in the sky.
    The dream, the chance, the hope that dies.
    Youíll never know until you realize.
    MY FAVE MUSIC ARTISTS:

    RHCP, The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Mojo Toad Quartet, John Mayer, Led Zeppelin, Sublime, Prince, Bob Marley, Marooon 5, Audioslave, Aerosmith, Guns n' Roses, The Killers, George Harrison, John Lenon, Regina Spektor, Damien Marley, Alicia Keys, Dave Matthews Band, Ellis Paul, Santana, Micheal Jackson, old Shakira, Outkast, Frederic Chopin, Rage Against the Machine, Eric Clapton, old Mariah Carey, old R. kelly, The Doors, etc.

    Sizzilingmachi is my husband! Amsal!

  9. #144
    Quote Originally Posted by SweetSweetIrony
    I know, but barely anyone here seems capable of anything else.
    like me... haha


    A world of war
    The peace is missing
    Victims bawl and cry
    But no oneís listening

    Forgotten are the dead
    None seem to care
    That they gave their lives
    So that we may still be here

    Our country is at war
    Skirmishing for peace
    Donít they realize
    This fight will never cease?

    The cause isnít reachable
    Lives are wasted endlessly
    Fighting for something that doesnít exist
    Is dim as far as I can see

    I ponder this thought
    Wonder how could this all be
    And fall asleep every night
    Wishing I would wake from this dream
    ~*~ What the hell is a Grand Poofta? ~*~

    'Dear Diary, Please tell Jerrod to SHUT THE HELL UP! From, Byron'
    'Dear Diary, Byron talked to me today. YES! Love, Jerrod'
    -The Force Band Camp 2008

  10. #145
    DragonEyes Guest
    I'm a new person willing to try out poetry. I want an honest criticism reply please.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

    Everyday the world seems to be changing
    Changing into a world with no peace
    You hear about it everyday
    The wars never seem to cease
    You just can't get away

    All I want is peace throughout the world
    Not just in one country
    Not in two
    But, all of them
    Just between me and you

    I can't remember the last time where there were no wars
    I can't remember back to the time where people got along
    Back when race didn't matter
    The only thing I can do is scream
    Scream and imagine a better world
    The wars will never rest as is seems

    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    I don't know....I really don't like it..What do you think?

  11. #146
    Quote Originally Posted by DragonEyes
    I'm a new person willing to try out poetry. I want an honest criticism reply please.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

    Everyday the world seems to be changing
    Changing into a world with no peace
    You hear about it everyday
    The wars never seem to cease
    You just can't get away

    All I want is peace throughout the world
    Not just in one country
    Not in two
    But, all of them
    Just between me and you

    I can't remember the last time where there were no wars
    I can't remember back to the time where people got along
    Back when race didn't matter
    The only thing I can do is scream
    Scream and imagine a better world
    The wars will never rest as is seems

    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    I don't know....I really don't like it..What do you think?
    It's okay... it sounds like you didnt put much heart into it but rather you just went in search of words that rhymed.
    ~*~ What the hell is a Grand Poofta? ~*~

    'Dear Diary, Please tell Jerrod to SHUT THE HELL UP! From, Byron'
    'Dear Diary, Byron talked to me today. YES! Love, Jerrod'
    -The Force Band Camp 2008

  12. #147
    OnceUponATime♥ Guest
    i want an honest opinion on my poem please. THANX

    Untitled

    i cant believe it
    it's happened once more
    another one died
    another knock on heavens door

    theres been too many to count
    deaths of young adults
    we all take life for granted
    and look at the results

    she was only a teenager
    graduating this year
    one ride in a friends car
    leaves everyone in tears.

    this is getting too close to home
    too many i have seen passed
    why is it so hard
    to make a life last?

    you'll be deeply missed
    this i can say is true
    you'll be in our hearts
    our tears forever with you.

    RIP Carly!

  13. #148
    DragonEyes Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Reiko
    It's okay... it sounds like you didnt put much heart into it but rather you just went in search of words that rhymed.

    I agree with you..I just started writing poetry again awhile ago and, What do you know, I'm published. I took your advice and tried something new. Thanks much!

  14. #149
    Quote Originally Posted by DragonEyes
    I agree with you..I just started writing poetry again awhile ago and, What do you know, I'm published. I took your advice and tried something new. Thanks much!
    Really? Cool. What poem(s) got published? Could I read it? And in what book?
    ~*~ What the hell is a Grand Poofta? ~*~

    'Dear Diary, Please tell Jerrod to SHUT THE HELL UP! From, Byron'
    'Dear Diary, Byron talked to me today. YES! Love, Jerrod'
    -The Force Band Camp 2008

  15. #150
    psycho08chick05 Guest
    hey i was wonderi...what do yall do like when all you can do is write poems? i mean i will try to do my school work *tried when school was in session its summer break now but still* and i end up just writing poems and dont even realize im doing it. i have over 451 poems that i wrote in school alone...

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