TEASED BY THE TEACHER!

Dear Jellybean,

All my life I have been called names and have been made fun of, for as long as I can remember. The most common tease is my name. It’s from another country, so I can understand why it would be mispronounced, because it isn’t really a common name. But whenever a sub or a teacher at school says my name wrong, everybody starts laughing. I don’t understand what’s so funny about a person not saying my name right. I try to act like I don’t care, but I do care, and it hurts my feelings. But mostly, it makes me angry, I mean I know that people who come into my life at one point will not say my name right and eventually they get it right, but seriously, is that really something to be laughing about. All I say to them in “If somebody said your name incorrectly and people started laughing, I’m sure you wouldn’t like it either.” All they do is give me a dirty look and then keep on laughing! I know that I should be able to handle this problem, because I have been dealing with it all my life. But seriously, it makes me mad and I am so sick of it. Even the subs act all rude about it. Especially, this one sub that constantly teaches at my school and gives me a hard time.

Now, my school is three grades (6, 7, 8), this is my last year there so I have already been there for two years. Now, this one sub has been saying my name wrong since my first year at that school. Now maybe the first year I can understand, it may be hard to remember my name. But, whenever I correct him when he says my name wrong, he gives me smart ass comments like "Oh good." One time he even said "Whatever." It hurts my feelings and I get so mad. He even said that if he was teaching a person enough times he would know their names and how to say it right. But he hasn’t said my name correct for two years! Including this year. I don’t understand why he has to be such a jerk when it comes to my name. I don’t mind correcting him, I mean yes that’s a little annoying, but hey, it always happens. I just can’t handle the comments or responses he gives me WHEN I correct him. I just want to take care of this problem. Or at least not make this such a huge issue in my life at school.

Please help the teasing and rude comments from subs stop!!!!

-Singer14

Dear Singer14,

You can't totally prevent kids from teasing you, although I agree that it's obnoxious, and even has a tinge of bigotry about it. (After all, what's so funny about a name that's a bit different, or hard to pronounce? What's that laughter really about?) I think you've been handling it very well, by simply explaining that you don't enjoy being laughed at, and trying to make them see your point of view.

When it comes to teachers though, you have every right to expect decent treatment, and equal treatment to the other kids in your class. After all, your parents' tax dollars are partially paying those teacher salaries! Plus, if a teacher kept on teaching you a vocabulary word, day after day, and you kept getting it wrong, they would send you to some "special" class. Maybe your sub needs one! Now I'm just kidding - I'm not saying your sub has a learning disorder - but he is either willfully saying your name wrong to make fun of you, or he is not playing with a full deck of intelligence cards. Either way, it's something that your parents, and the school principal, need to know about, as soon as possible.

Tell your parents, as calmly and straight-forwardly as you can, what's been going on with this sub. Explain that you have been very respectful in requesting that he learn your name, but that he continues to get it wrong, and to treat you rudely when you try and address the problem. Ask your parents to accompany you to speak to your school's principal, in the hopes of getting this matter sorted out.

Ideally, the principal will take your parents seriously, and will talk to this sub about being nicer to you - and practicing your name at night, if necessary, to get it right! I hope that's what happens. Because we all deserve to treated as equals by our educators, and to be called by the right name, even if it is a bit hard to pronounce. Good luck!