MOM WON'T LISTEN

Dear Jellybean,

Yes i have done some wrong things in the past, that include lying to my mom, but who hasn't. But i find that it seems now that i have my mom takes everything i do or say to heart, and she makes thing a bigger deal then they really are. You see a year ago i went on 2 dates with this boy, when i wasn't aloud to, and said i was going with someone else. My mom found out and i got in trouble. Know when ever i try and ask to do something like with a friend its no. If its yes then its amazing. but if i ask why its no she'll bring up the past. She also said I could have a bf now so that's fine. But now my very best friend geoffrey, is moving, and ill never get to see him again. He did tell me that if he wasn't moving then he would have gone out with me. So i told my mom about that, and then when i ask her if i can do something with him its no, and i tell her i want to say goodbye before he leaves because he is leaving at the end of july, and all my mom says is who cares let him go if he is leaving, you don't need to say goodbye. And she doest care that we have been friends for 2 years. So then i was really good for a while, i made my mom really happy by cleaning the house showing i was responsible, and then i ask her if i can go to his house to play some guitar with him, since I'm not aloud to go for a walk with him because she thinks i could get kid napped and she says no and her reason is because she thinks ill get pregnant, implying that ill have sex with him and he will attack me. I try to sit down with her and talk to her but she wont, i even catch her at a good time but she wont listen. Please Please Please jellybean I really need you help! And soon before he leaves!
-SadlyDesperate

Dear SadlyDesperate,

Your mom sounds pretty committed to preventing you from getting in trouble. It sounds like the lies you told her in the past gave her a big scare - she obviously was very freaked out to learn you weren't where, or with whom, she thought you were. Even though you've acted maturely since then, and asked nicely for what you want, your mom is stuck in that fear of something bad happening to you. In a way it's annoying, but in another way, at least it's sweet that she cares so much about you.

Anyway, let's address your dilemma. Your mom is worried that you're going to get kidnapped or pregnant if you go to your friend's house, right? So here's what you do: Ask her if he can come over to your house, so you can hang out with him and she can be around to supervise or "pop in" and check on you, whenever her nerves act up.

If you're not really going to do anything with him (and it sounds like he's not interested in that anyway), it shouldn't matter whether you see him at your place or his. You can play guitar at your place, and if your mom's in a giving mood, maybe you can even ask him to stay for dinner.

In fact, make it a special goodbye for your friend - despite the parental supervision - by getting him a goodbye cake for after dinner, and maybe a little present too. I know it's not your ideal way of seeing him for the last time, but if it's a choice between this and not seeing him at all (or sneaking out and getting grounded for life), it seems pretty clear what you should do.