MOM IS BANNING HER BF

Dear Jellybean,

I'm going to be 18 in less than 5 months and my boyfriend ive dated for more than a year can on a family trip with me my mom my sister and her friend. Before the trip my mom liked my boyfriend. While on the trip everything he did bothered her. She also said he was disrespectful, which she's the only one who agrees with that. So now that we got back my mom told me I'm never allowed to talk to him or see him again. Just because of the trip, which she was pmsing on, so I would like to know what you think and what i should tell her to be allowed to see him again with permission, because of course i do it with out any but I don't want to do that. So I would like your advice thanks.

Dear Writer,

It's not my help you need... it's your boyfriend's. He needs to wage a major politeness campaign to win over your mom. You can do a little research by asking your mom (if you don't already know) what exactly he did that she found disrespectful. Did he call her by her first name, when she wanted to be called Mrs. (Whatever)? Did he grab stuff at the dinner table, instead of asking to have it passed to him? Did he forget to thank your parents for including him on the family trip? Get the specifics. Once you know what he did wrong in your mom's eyes, you can report back to your boyfriend. (And forget arguing with your mom - if she feels dissed, no amount of explaining or excuses from you is going to fix that).

Then your BF is going to have to swallow his pride and apologize to your mom, for not being on his best behavior during the trip. If he cares for you in a real way, this is something he'll be willing to do. (If not, then he's not worth worrying about!) Have him come over, or phone your mom, and nicely apologize. He shouldn't make any excuses (I was tired, I didn't realize, you didn't tell me, etc...). He needs to take responsibility for not living up to your mom's standards. If he can do this sincerely, he may be able to convince your mom that he's worth a second chance.