NOT GOOD ENOUGH?

Dear Jellybean,

My friends are always making me feel like what im doing isn't good enough my cell phone carrier isn't good enough they have better ones, my job isn't good enough they make more than i do, and all that, they are always try to upstage me and i don't know why i don't like to be in competition with my friends but what do i do? is it because they don't feel good about themselves?
-Feeling not good enough

Dear Feeling not good enough,

It's doubtful that your friends have a self-esteem issue. In fact, it sounds like they think quite highly about themselves, and their possessions! This is really about you feeling less than good enough, because you're not hitting all the right status buttons. My suggestion is, adopt a "who cares about material things" attitude that puts you above such petty concerns. Your job doesn't earn you as much as your friends make? So what, maybe you have more fun, or get along better with your boss, or it's a short commute from home. Your cell phone carrier isn't the popular one? Who cares, you get a good deal on minutes. You get the idea.

From now on, when people try to upstage you, let them have the stage - and give the impression that you couldn't care less. You can do this by smiling, saying slowly and kindly, "How nice for you" or "If that's important to you, I'm glad you feel like you've got the 'right' phone carrier." Mix just a pinch of pity in with the sweetness (to let them know you think it's kind of sad/funny that they care about such petty concerns), but say it nicely. Aim for being so happy with yourself, that you don't need labels and status symbols to tell you that you're okay. And aim for letting people know that about you.