HOW TO BREAK UP WITH HIM

Dear Jellybean,

I've got a dilemma. I want to break up with my boyfriend of 3 months (and some days). He's my first boyfriend, and so I've never gone through a breakup. We hardly talked at all (in person) and I was wondering how to break up with someone. And I need to do this soon. I feel really bad. For the way that I look at other guys. And I think he knows that I'm interested in other people. I've lost ALL feelings towards him. How am I supposed to break up with someone if we never (and I mean NEVER) talked?

Dear Writer,

I hate to break it to you, but if you never, ever talked... you never had a real boyfriend either. You might have called yourself his girlfriend, and thought of yourself as one, but being in a relationship requires actually exchanging words - not just texts, or looks, or even kisses. If there was never any conversation, the relationship didn't really exist, except maybe in your imaginations.

Normally I would tell someone that breaking up with someone by email is too impersonal, and to do it in person. But in your case, it would be totally weird to make your first actual conversation about the break-up! So send him an email, and keep it short and sweet. You might say something like, "You're a great guy, but this relationship isn't working for me. I think we should go our separate ways. Hope we can stay friends." You can even leave out that last sentence, if you don't think you want to stay in close touch with him.

By the way, you have nothing to feel bad about for looking at other guys. Even the most committed girls sneak a peek at cute boys every now and then. There's nothing wrong with looking, as long as you don't act on your attraction to guys other than your BF. And in your case, when you basically had no contact with your BF, who else were you supposed to look at, really? So no worries, you're still a good person. And now you'll be free to find a new boyfriend, who actually talks to you... and listens to you too.