BOY/IM DILEMMA

Dear Jellybean,

Ew. Boy dillemma. Ok so i really like this guy and my friend was a true believer that he liked me back. We all knew each other from a science class we had together. so i had his sn and we would talk and whatever. so one day my 7th grader little cousin (im in 9th) who doesnt even know him got a hold of his sn and w/o my permission started talking to him. I didnt really mind as long as she didnt mention anything about me and didnt say anything stupid. So shes like oh i am talking to him. and im like are u kidding what are you saying!? Dont mention my name! so she says oh oops im sorry. And so she told him my name and now he wanted to know what my last name was so i say to her no dont tell him! She was saying things that i never wanted her to say like "My cousin told me to request you on myspace and she has brown hair and shes in your bio class and she doesnt want me to tell you her last name" and all of this other crap. So i imed him after this all was done and i say omg i am so sorry about my cousin so he just says lol and puts up his away message. I got even more angry at my cousin because even after that whole thing she still continued to im him even when i told her not to! So the next day (today) i get to bio and he totally ignores me the whole period. The flirting was going just fine between me and him but now he wont even look at me. I dont know what to do!
Please help,
-Bad Day

Dear Bad Day,

Oops. Your cousin made you seem a bit stalker-ish, didn't she? It's flattering to a guy when he thinks a girl likes him. But if he thinks you spend all your time talking and scheming about him - like your cousin made it seem - it can come off as weird and off-putting.

I think you need to let this whole situation cool off, before you try flirting with your crush again. Give him the chill treatment, where you act like you don't notice he exists. Talk to other friends in bio class, don't talk to him, or even give him looks. Once he gets the picture that you're not obsessed with him, or even that interested in him, he might come around and start up the flirting again.

Of course, it's possible that your cousin ruined things for good, but who knows what time will bring. Your best strategy right now is a tactical retreat, and hopefully that will draw him back into being interested in you.

Finally, I'm sure you've already realized this, but I'd suggest keeping your crushes a secret from your cousin from now on. If you want to talk about your crushes, you should only trust friends/relations who can handle the info without getting involved and potentially messing things up for you.