TROUBLE LETTING GO

Dear Jellybean,

My Freshman year in high school, I dated this guy. After we broke up, we stayed really good friends. Everything was fine until the next year when he started dating this girl who was sort of a friend of mine. That's when I realized that I still had feelings for him. We were working on a play together at the time, so I couldn't just ignore him. Both of us were either plain mean or really cold toward each other, especially me. Later that same year, in the spring while we were working on the musical together we became friends again. After he broke up with his girlfriend, we went a little beyond just friends. But later I found out that he had also been acting the same way with two other girls, who just happened to be two of my good friends. After a while of being angry, I forgave him. We've been friends for almost two years, but I can't let go of the romantic part of our relationship. Worse, he keeps starting it up again. I want to get out of this pattern that I'm in. I've been working on it, but I'm afraid of letting go of our friendship. I'm not sure I can stay friends with him and get over him. Oh, and I also haven't dated anyone else since we broke up. What can I do?
-Friends?

Dear Friends?,

I think you saved the most important part of your letter til the end. You haven't dated anyone since you guys broke up - and I think that's a big reason you're writing. Meaning, you probably wouldn't still be hung up on your ex, if you had met someone else who you were interested in.

I think you need to cure your crush on this friend, by looking for someone new to adore. This guy hasn't acted that well, and quite frankly, he doesn't sound good enough for you. Next time he tries to start something, tell him, "I only want to do that with someone who really wants to be with me, in a serious way." That will give him the opportunity to either confess his undying love, or to go after someone else (I suspect the latter will happen). Then you must resolve to get over this guy, whether that means ending the friendship or not, and pin your romantic hopes on someone new.