HIGHLIGHTS AND CONVINCING MOM

Dear Jellybean,

I really want to get highlights, but I don't know what color to get them. I have brunette hair and medium skin. I don't want anything crazy, i just want something that says, "Look at me! I'm fun and sophisticated!" I also want to know, how can i get my mom to approve of highlights? She thinks I'm "too young", but I'm 15! Can you help me out?
Sincerely,
Bored of Just Brunette

Dear Bored,

Highlights can definitely deliver that "fun and sophisticated" look you're after. For tips on the best color highlights for you, and how to do a trial run before you commit to permanent streaks, check out the advice I gave to another brown-haired girl on this page (click here).

As for getting your mom's permission, there are a few strategies that you could try. She's said you are too young, so you might want to face that head-on. Approach her with an idea for a "deal", such as, if you prove that you're mature over the summer - by helping around the house, keeping your room clean, obeying curfew, setting the table every night for dinner, or whatever she sees as "responsible" behavior - then she agrees to let you get highlights for back-to-school time.

Since your mom is focused on the "too young" thing, whatever you do, don't whine or act babyish if she shoots you down. The more mature and reasonable you can be about this, the more she'll have to recognize that you actually are old enough - and grown-up enough - to have highlights in your hair. Act selfishly, or claim that she's ruining your life by saying no, and you'll just increase the chances that you'll never get what you want.

Be aware of cost. Getting highlights done professionally is pretty expensive. (As a brunette, you should go to the salon the first time, at least - then you can maintain the color at home, for future touch-ups, with tips from your colorist). So offer to pay for the color yourself, or at least pay half. That's pretty mature and it's also fair. If you need to get a part-time job, or earn money by doing chores or babysitting, then there you go. Part of being "old enough" for things you want, is doing the work to pay for them, if needed.

You could also try a different approach with your mom, by asking her if she wants to get highlights with you! Present it as a "bonding" activity that you could do together, and make it sound fun. You know, a morning at the salon, followed by lunch and a nice mother-daughter chat about life, the universe, and everything. Who knows, maybe she'll go for it!